Reading between the votes

All the strange things y'all wrote on the Best Of Savannah ballot

Updated May 20, 2015 at 9:21 p.m.

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THERE COMES a point in counting the Best Of Savannah votes that you really wish drinking was allowed at work. Actually, there's several points where that occurs, usually within the first day.

Not the counting the votes is all bad! In fact, the only reason to do it year after year is the hilarious things that people put in for answers at times.

But first, a bit of explanation.

Remember back in April when you were clicking through all 333 categories, spread over 7 sections, on the Best Of Savannah ballot? Or was it all just a blur that you accomplished during a staff meeting, or at 3 a.m., or while your significant other was telling you about their day?

Remember that there were two ways you could vote in the categories: either choose from a drop down list or write in an answer? The write-in votes are where things can take a sharp detour from normal and veer off into the cow patties of really interesting.

Never mind the various, um, options, for spelling (quick, how do YOU spell gelato?). Ignore that you may not know your bartender’s name (or more likely, you can never remember it). Forget about the sudden brain gaps that occur when you’re trying to recall the name of that place that makes that those really great sandwiches—you know, that one that’s in Midtown on that street?

Yeah, you’re faking it again, or interrupting your S.O. telling you about their day to ask where that place is, and all hell breaks loose, because then they know you weren’t really paying attention to them this time.

But never mind about my personal life...

The thing is, when it’s just a person and a blank space, what comes out of their head can be surprising. This is when the self-censor disappears and the ego swells to the power of the moment. Usually. There were many comments of disbelief or “I don’t know” or “if you find one, let me know.”

Often, these were over various niche categories, such as Best French or Vegetarian Restaurant. But that’s what we’re here for, to highlight hidden gems of the city.

It was also fun to see responses in the Best Liberal and Conservative category. Naturally people chimed in to say “THERE IS ONE” or a few colorful epitaphs.

Perhaps we should have a Best Of Brunch and just invite people from those two categories? I’ll bring popcorn and help set up the bleachers! Or maybe a festival where everyone gathers in one spot to do their voting?

But this is getting long. So, without further padding of this column, here’s list of the funnier or more odd comments.

Best Veggie Burger: “The devil was asked to leave heaven for eating veggie burgers”

Best Indian Restaurant: “My kitchen, she said humbly”

Best Bartender: “my husband”

“girl with weird hats at American Legion”

Best Local Album: “we haven’t made one yet”

Most Crushworthy Savannahian: “You’re looking at him baby”

Best Savannahian: “You’re Still looking at him, baby”

Film Festival: “That one that showed that movie”

Best Local Author: “Janey (Jane from Brighter Day’s best friend)”

Best Pilates: “Dollhouse and The Distillery”

Best Psychologist: “my dog”

Craziest Local Crime Story: “THE CITY forcing the Westin NOT to put a blockage in front of the racetrack and the CITY making the Westin? Golf course take down every blockade or gate they put in front of the entrance to the raceway UNITL BEN TUCKER GOT KILLED”

Best Judge: “Lori Judge for Best Judge” (she’s a realtor, not a judge)

Celebrity Spotting: “Myself in the Mirror”

Person You’ll Miss the Most: “Shorty that used to take pics and sell them back to you”

Maid: “me”

“Mom”

“It’s a dirty job”

cs

Published May 20, 2015 at 4:00 a.m.

Brandon Blatcher

Brandon Blatcher has been pushing pixels around since the early '90s. When not foolin' with pixels, he gets into all sort of art related trouble.
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