You gotta admire W. You really do. Thats one fine specimen of manhood.
Did you see him down in Mississippi after the storm, rolling up his sleeves and pitchin right in to help the folks? That was inspiring.
Just the sort of sturdy, reassuring fellow we need up there in the White House. Gets to work. Cuts through all the red tape. Doesnt sweat the details.
Like, for example, all those firefighters standing beside him in the picture. Turns out, some liberal reporter pointed out, those guys were flown in just for the occasion so our W. could look presidential.
Which — duh — is precisely what the country needs in a time of disaster. Jeez.
Gotta wonder, though, about those hundreds of highly-trained firefighters they had sitting around in an Atlanta hotel for days while folks were getting wiped out on the Gulf Coast.
Even if most of the dead were on welfare, that kind of seems a shame. Shows you how things get mucked up when government bureaucracy gets involved. Makes you speculate what sort of fools in charge.
Our man W., though, you have to like him. He sees something that needs doing; he goes out and does it. Doesnt sit around all day wasting time thinking about it. He just acts.
And man, hes generous. That Mike Brown, at FEMA, shoot, no one else would have even given that boy a chance.
But W. said, buddy, I dont care if youre utterly unqualified and all youve ever done is screw up some fancy-schmantzy horse show thing. Thats what Americas all about, giving a fellow a second chance.
Then, Lord, the press gets all over Mike when he says he doesnt know about nobody dying down at that convention center. Like he had nothin to do but sit around all day and watch CNN. Now hes got plenty of time, thanks to them sniping liberals.
Burns me up, too, about that pretty boy Harry Connick, Jr. Plays fruity music. Then traipses right on down there to the convention center and talks to them folks. Half of them looters, probably.
Like hes something special. Like anybody could just roll in there like him and hand out food and water.
People, especially those people, are so impatient these days. Sitting around waiting for the government to do everything for them.
Shoot, youd think theyd be grateful. Its like W.s Mama said, things actually worked out pretty well for them. Nice cot in the Astrodome, three square meals a day. Plenty better than sittin at home with your friendly local crack dealer down on the corner.
Why the hell didnt they get out of town anyway? Sure seems like any moron could anticipate what would happen when a major-league blow like Katrina came roaring in.
All you gotta do is go down to the ATM, take out a few hundred, and get out. Whats so hard about that?
Kills me, too, how the liberal press is blaming W. for everything. Like anybody could predict a big storm like Katrina coming in and wiping out everything.
As soon as the hurricane hit — well, pretty soon after — W.s boys were right there on the TV, talking about how they had help on the way.
Shoot, I must have seen a dozen press conferences where they promised help. Real soon.
And Ill be damned if those people down there didnt do nothing but whine. Makes you sick.
Problem is, no ones willing to take responsibility these days. First thing they do is point fingers, blame everyone else. Any fool can see, anyway, that its all the local and state governments fault.
Not to mention the press. The Weather Service. And Mother Nature.
Thank goodness, though, Americas got someone like W. in charge. Not one to play the blame game.
Get one of them pantywaist Democrats in the White House and wed be hopelessly in debt, painfully divided, and about as popular around the world as malaria.
Itd be awful.
That W., though, you gotta admire how he plunges into things without thinking. Thats the problem with the world today: too much planning, contemplating, considering and re-considering everything.
So long as W.s in the White House, we dont have nothing to worry about that on that score.
And I for one, as a real American, am deeply grateful.
This article appears in Sep 21-28, 2005.